Vocation Story of Seminarian Philip Kosloski
As time goes on, you discover how much God's guiding hand was in your life. Now I may say that it took until my junior year of high school to distinctly hear God calling me to the priesthood, but the faint idea of me one day being a priest did exist early on.
I soon began to serve at Mass, which I enjoined thoroughly and wouldn't miss it if I was scheduled. I stayed with it and once I entered junior high, I started to train new altar servers. During the training sessions a fellow server helped me and dubbed me "Father Phil," in reference to my taking the part of the priest while explaining the Mass. Oddly enough, this new nickname struck a cord and somehow did not surprise me nor did I shun away from it. Once again, this stayed in the back of my mind for years to come.
The actual challenge to become a priest was put forth only a few years later. Still an altar server, I was given the chance to serve at my sister's Confirmation for then Bishop Burke. He showed me what it was to be a great man and a great priest all in one. Afterwards, he asked all of the servers on whether or not we thought about becoming a priest. I thought it to be quiet silly to be asking such a question so early. Bishop Burke still gave us all vocation holy cards to us that had a short prayer on it for discerning God's Will. Little did I know that I would end up praying that prayer a few weeks later for weeks at a time before I went to bed. But I still did not see the priesthood as a feasible option.Finally we get to my junior year in high school at SPASH. Up until this point faith still only played a minor part in my life. It took one Sunday afternoon for God to push me into a complete conversion. I decided where I was taking myself did not fulfill me; I wanted something more. As I was inclined to make use of the internet, it was the first place I went to. I began a journey to learn more about the Catholic faith and started to discover so much that I did not know. I continued that adventure when I joined the Dead Theologians Society at St. Peter. Having other people my age around me, who were also drawn into a deeper life in the Church, supported and helped me to go farther than I myself was willing to go. I ended up learning about the priesthood and found it a possibility in my life. The total dedication to God and the Church attracted me and so I entertained the thought of entering seminary to study to become a priest; I had to be 100% certain though.
I contacted Fr. Hirsch the vocation director of the Diocese of La Crosse and showed him my interest. However, a few months later I did not have the same zeal as before. I could not make up my mind and doubted if God really was calling me. So I decided to go the other route. I started dating.Thankfully I met this amazing young woman, who happened to be a member of the Dead Theologians Society too. I began to date her in the August before my senior year of High School. It proved to be a great experience to me in discovering what true love really is. We made sure to do this relationship right and put God as the center. Going to weekly Adoration and Mass together kept us together. With God in the picture, it is much easier to keep strong, even when it gets tough. Through this relationship my faith deepened and became even more active. Nevertheless, God had other plans for me.
Oddly enough my relationship with this girl opened up many doors for me, in terms of helping out with retreats and religious education. The first weekend of October we were able to attend St. John Bosco Youth Day at Holy Hill. I went to confession that day in one of their white tents they had set up and before I could leave the confessional, the priest stopped me. He asked me, "How long have you been thinking about the priesthood?" I was taken aback by what he just said, but still answered, "Off and on for about a year." The priest replied, "I am certain that you have a vocation." If that isn't a kick in the face I don't know what is. Being still confused, though how can you be confused about that, I exited the tent and quickly met up with my girlfriend. We then talked about the names of our children when we get married. How about that for confusion? I tucked this incident in the back of my mind, not wanting it to be true. There was still that girl and I didn't want to let her go. I continued on, set for marriage, but this occurrence did not leave my mind. It bugged me and I couldn't deny it. I talked with Fr. Hirsch again a couple of times, but mainly telling him how this relationship I had was so great.Then January rolls around and things begin to take a turn for the worse and I could not deny that the relationship wouldn't last. God was showing me this relationship has come to its full term; it was no longer necessary for me to be in it. At this time I knew it would be over soon, so I started to think seriously about entering seminary. The beginning of February came and she saw too that our relationship couldn't go on. We departed on very good terms and to this day remain great friends. The "God or the Girl" saga had ended, there was no reason why I shouldn't join seminary.
I spent most of my off hours praying. I looked intently to God to pave the way for me and show where to go. God did that and more. The next month, a month after I ceased dating, I was able to meet with Fr. Hirsch at a retreat. He asked me about seminary and I told him that was exactly what I wanted to do. I completed all of the necessary requirements to be a seminarian of the Diocese of La Crosse and in a month I became one. Two months after I was dating, I already had the status of a seminarian. I was excited to say the least. God placed a great peace within my heart, a peace that lasted for a few weeks. No confusion remained in my mind; I knew what God was calling me to.The following week I visited Saint John Vianney Seminary and never looked back. I fell in love with the life at SJV. There was no other place that I wanted to be. I entered in fall and soon completed my first year. Seminary life proved to be the most amazing experience in my entire life. The dedication to prayer, getting up at 6:00 am for a holy hour before the Blessed Sacrament, enriched my daily life. Daily Prayer became such a pivotal part of my life that it spilled into everything I did. Even the extra times in the chapel, created in me a wonderful feeling that I knew this is what I enjoy. The fraternity among the men at SJV is spectacular. The amount of horse play, practical jokes, and good clean fun gives you a great sense of camaraderie among the other seminarians. Everyone there has the same solid attitude and is committed to lead a holy life in the Church. It is truly a place to be formed to become a Man of Christ in the Catholic Church. Now with our seminary overflowing with vocations, it is becoming a great source of hope for the Church to come. The increase in two years from around 100 seminarians to now 150 shows just how great it is to live in community with men who are dedicated to preserving the traditions of the Church in whatever vocation they end up being called to. The greatest advice I can give, is that if you are thinking about seminary, visit one and you will be so surprised that you will want to enter.
As I look ahead to the many years of formation to come, I enjoy the prospect of me someday becoming a priest. It won't be easy to be a priest, but it will certainly be the most rewarding. A priest is the shepherd of his flock, leading them to their promised heavenly home. He must even lay down his life for them, becoming a victim upon the altar, uniting his sacrifice with Christ's. Priests are the modern day heroes, giving themselves up daily, not worrying how everything will work out, but trusting fully in the Divine Will of God. Wherever it is God leads me, I know that it will be to a life full of joy and sacrifice.